The financial turmoil was taking its toll on our marriage. My husband and I had always been able to speak openly about finances, but the stress affected every aspect of our lives. I was tense and we were arguing a lot. I didn’t know how much we could sustain.
It was during one of these arguments that my husband said, “Look, I just want to be happy.” Up until this point all of our discussions had centered on how do we save the house. We hadn’t stopped to consider what we really wanted. What did we need to be happy? For me this was an epiphany.
From that point on instead of thinking “how do I save my house”, I started to think about “what do I really want out of life” and “what does happiness look like?” The list was short and simple:
- I wanted a happy marriage, which minus the tension caused by our financial situation, I had and I cherished.
- I wanted to start a family. I was 35 at the time so I didn’t have the luxury of putting this off for 5-7 years. But I wasn’t about to have a child that I couldn’t afford.
- And finally, I wanted financial independence. I wanted to live free of the stress that living beyond your means and living paycheck to paycheck breeds.
My husband and I compared notes and found that we were completely in sync. At no point did either of us say that our happiness was wrapped up in our house. At this point it was a chain around our necks and we were drowning.
We knew what we had to do.
“The first step to getting the things you want out of life is this: Decide what you want.”
~ Ben Stein
My Story (part 6): The bank will help us…right?
Or start from the beginning here.
Hi, I’m Cathy! I’m a former career-driven professional turned stay-at-home mom. Living on one salary has its challenges, but it is possible to live the good life while spending less. Cool to be Frugal is all about how we’re thriving, not just surviving, on a single income.
